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Dieses Thema hat 16 Antworten
und wurde 1.030 mal aufgerufen
 Alles weitere: Sport, Sæx, Bier und Selbsterlebtes
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Proconsul Antipathos Offline

Beiträge: 1.208

10.05.2009 13:55
#16 RE: Ob man nach der Geschichte in Landshut Antworten

Auch reichlich polemisch und typisch U.S.-John-Wayne-Mentalität, aber ich musste schmunzeln:

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2009-03-23, 3:43AM EST

I was the guy with the black Burberry jacket that you demanded I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.

I hope you somehow come across this message.

I'd like to apologize.

I didn't expect you to crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a reason that evening, and it wasn't that cold outside.

You see, my girlfriend had just bought me that new .45 ACP pistol for Christmas, and we had just picked up a shoulder holster for it that evening. Beautiful pistol, eh?

It's a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head, isn't it? I know it probably wasn't a great deal of fun for you. I'm sure it was even worse since you also had to leave your shoes, cellphone, and wallet with me. I couldn't have you calling up any of your buddies to come help you try to mug us again. I took the liberty of calling your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, and explaining to her your situation.

I also bought myself and four other people in the gas station this morning a tank full of gas on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to one of the homeless guys along with all of the cash in your wallet.

I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cellphone. They'll be on your bill in case you'd like to know which ones.

I hope they haven't permanently cut off your service.

I could only get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI with it. The FBI guy was really pissed and we had a long chat (I guess while he traced the number).

I'd also like to apologize for not killing you instead.

- Alex

«Es war ein großer Drink. Groß und sehr lang. Einer jener besonderen Cocktails, dessen klebrige Ingredienzen ganz langsam ins Glas geschüttet werden, damit sie dort einzelne Schichten bilden. Solche Getränke nannte man "Ampel" oder "Rache des Regenbogens". An Orten, wo man größeren Wert auf die Wahrheit legte, trugen sie auch Namen wie "Hallo und lebt wohl, liebe Gehirnzellen".»

El Combatante Offline

Beiträge: 1.162

11.05.2009 17:42
#17 RE: Ob man nach der Geschichte in Landshut Antworten


Hey, isch bin der Sensemann, isch komme mit der Sense, Mann.

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